I dont know wat to do

[zachary]

I was in my locker room when I saw someone take out a bag of weed. They swore it wasn't their but they were saving it for a friend. They told me what friend but that doesn't help me. I know the people involved and I know the friend. Should I let them smoke weed and maybe get addicted or should I tell someone who can help them.

[LindaM]

who would be the one you would tell?
how did you feel being in that situation?

[zachary]

I would tell the guidance counsellor. But then they would know it was me. Im in a bad position here.

[Jaclyn]

Hi Zachary-

I agree- you are in a tough position. However, I always try and differenciate between bad secrets and good secrets. A good secret is something that you promise to not tell because you know that there will be no negative consequences of keeping it to yourself. A bad secret is one that you know you should have never promised to keep! In the future, you can say that this is not a secret you feel comfortable keeping because it puts the other person at risk. They may be temporarily mad at you for breaking their trust but they will be thankful to you later when they are not in trouble!

You are not the one who is doing anything wrong here!Your instinct is that something needs to be done. Have you thought about putting an anonymous letter under your guidance counselors door?

[zachary]

Thanks Jacklyn, that was a good suggestion. Im going to do that on monday.

[molly]

hi this is really hard but i need to talk to someone! um my brothers friends where caught doing drugs and my brother swore that he didn't do it! and my family and i all believed him, i was still scared for him that he would, so i talked to my guidance councelor and she said i should talk to my brother and i said that is hard becouse he is older then me, so she told me talk to him anyway so i did and he said he knows about drugs and he knows what they do to people and wont do it but this weekend my dad took my brother and a friend up north and then found out they where trying drugs! i don't know what to do! i am sooo scared for my brother! i have read a few books on drugs and am soooo scared of it and what it does i will never try it but my brother hasn't and i thought he was more mature and smart and responsible then his friends he [b]is[b] more responsible but not with this! i don't want anything to happen to him becouse as much as he is mean to me i still love him, and am scared out of my mind for him! what should i do my parents know and want to punish him but i can't stand knowing that he could still try it again and get addicted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! help!!!!!!!!

[Laura]

hey molly,

As much as you want to help this is a struggle that a lot of people go through. When you spoke to him he seemed to have a good understanding of drugs and how they may effect him, is it possible that at the country house his friends wanted to but he never did? Sometimes when people have friends who do things they do not approve of, it doesn't mean they stop hanging out with them. Maybe as much as they wanted to try, your brother still wanted to hang out with them!
IT is hard, you can tell your brother you love him and be careful, because you are right, some people say they want to 'try' but sometimes as you say- addiction can be a problem. Hopefully you're family won't lose too much trust in your brother, he needs you guys to trust him now. I'm sure he can make the right decision but this is his to decide.

What do you think? Anyone else been through a similar situation with friends or family?

[molly]

hi laura,
thanks for the advice.
and no i don't know anyone who has gone through this but i am going to talk to my guidance counselor at school! i need to talk to someone face to face about it and i know he did try it but i don't know what will happen!
thanks molly!